dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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