Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
She said her name was "party"
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Randomize
