I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
