don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
is it fun? or sober?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
