im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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