so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
I just gift wrapped bread.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
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