Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
Randomize
