So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
