I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize