fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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