thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
