I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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