bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
Randomize
