he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
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