Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
Randomize
