So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Randomize