i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
