I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize
