I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize