Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Randomize
