I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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