It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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