yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
