Bisexual people are plain selfish.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
He keeps bees of course he's weird
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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