I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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