why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
The beer is more important than you right now.
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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