She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Randomize
