White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
