I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
