We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize
