Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
