Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
