The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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