3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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