Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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