I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
