yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
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