Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize