Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
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