we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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