I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
is wine microwaveable?
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
