your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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