I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
