I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
