Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
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