I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize