If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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