Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Today has been the most awkward masturbatory day of my life. Possibly even more awkward than when my mom found my vibrator on Mother's Day.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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