thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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