You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
